Back for our last year!

Well it's hard to believe that we have been working on this for over a year now.  It seems like just yesterday when I took my first tenuous steps towards getting my MSN in Nursing Education at University of Texas-Brownsville.  As I look back on the experience I see how far I've come and how much I've learned.  For one thing I hadn't had to use a dictionary in years.  I am an average person who I always thought was fairly articulate.
So much of the terminology in the beginning I had to look up to understand things like, constructionist or epistemology.  That was somewhat humbling but rather cool to be learning new things again!  Then there was the hurdle of the whole technology issue.  Sometimes I feel like the world is hurling along faster and faster and there are not enough hours in the day nor neurotransmitters in the synapses to be able to understand it all.  I'm not perfect yet but I have made a lot of progress.  I purposely took a part time consulting job this summer to help a charter school put their CNA program into an online format.  As it turns out it was all pretty cut and dried but I realize it was the challenge of doing it and facing my fear that had me.  Now I feel more confident with it.
I guess some have fear or insecurity about being in the classroom or the clinical setting.  I have been doing that long enough that I don't have a problem with any of that.  I guess we all have our areas that are challenging to us.  I can't wait to see how much I can learn and grow this year, it's going to be awesome! 

Reflection on the practice of blogging

     My semester with the addition of blogging my reflections on my process towards getting my MSN has been very interesting.  When I read back on it,  I can definitely see growth and change.  I can't say I have successfully incorporated all these changes into my practice but at least I know the direction I want to move in and that gives me a clearer understanding of where I'm going and the goals I want to incorporate into my education and into my practice.  I must say when Dr. Miller had this down as a requirement for the course I thought " oh no, not more technology!"  But then I looked at the site and was somehow not too befuddled by it and was even able to upload photos by my self.  So I have to thank Dr Miller for making me do this.  I have now got my house set up with wifi and so I can sit in my recliner as I'm doing now in my nightgown and use my computer to write or look for articles on-line.  So yes, I can see a lot of progress and refinement of my aspirations for my practice as a nurse educator.  So it is a perfect universe after all.

Reflection

   My children laughed when I told them I had a blog about getting my MSN!  Like most 20somethings,they enjoy technology and wouldn't dream of living without it.  I see the progress I have made in a few months and have to smile.  Yesterday I went to Amazon to look for a book I wanted on Watson's caring theory and they asked me if I wanted it in paperback or in Kindle format.  I had heard of a Kindle but always rationalized I needed a physical book to highlight and hold in my hands.  Then I started looking into the reviews for these e book readers.  The thing that hooked me was that the Kindle holds about 3500 books in one small device.  So I will price different models and read reviews but I am about to dive into another facet of technology.  Lets hope I can figure out how to use it.

Reflecting on Practice and Goals

     In looking at where I have been in Nursing Education and where I'm going I reflect on my beginnings.  My first boss was like a drill Sergent in the military.  Rules and regulations were paramount and she was definitely rooted in the old school paradigm.  She seemed to enjoy disciplining students and making them squirm.  My nature is not really suited for that kind of authoritarian stuff. 

My second and third bosses at my current job were soooo different.  Supportive and  using more democratic approaches to guide the program.  It was very different to have a voice and vote. 

I realize now after some of the readings we have done that I have remnants of the first boss still left in me that may need to be exorcised.  I don't scream at the students or enjoy being tough on them.  What I do still have in me is a bit of the old school way of doing things.  "The sage on the stage", lecture approach.  I have been a bit resistant to change in the area of my approach to the way I run my classroom.  I figure since I have the knowledge of the material in the book I need to convey that knowledge to my students and lecture is the most efficient way of conveying that information to others.  Since I have been thinking about some of the things I read in Billings "Teaching in Nursing" (2009 chapter 12),  I can see I must evolve.  More importantly I am beginning to see why.  I never changed my approach before because it had worked pretty well until now.  I can see now thru my reading and my own experience with these online courses for my MSN, that adults need to take responsibility for their own learning. 
I'm not doing them any favors by just sticking the information into them (thru their ears) and hoping they can retain it.  I'm willing to try some things that involve the students taking more initiative and having a more participatory role.  I need to think this thru to find a way to incorporate this into my classes.

Getting My MSN Blog: Why choose education?

Getting My MSN Blog: Reflections on the process of developing a personal Educational Philosophy.
My developing a philosophy that was based in making sure future nurses are firmly based in caring came about somewhat accidentally. Seeing things that didn't depict caring behavior by nurses as a "young thing" in this profession made me realize the importance of making sure that was really emphasized in working with students. Seeing the less than perfect parts of the world makes me understand what is important to me and want to strive to achieve that. Some have lost touch with their caring selves thru over-work and burn out, or thru having to develop a thick skin to survive. Others may have never had a very caring spirit to begin with. It is something I think about a lot. I try to watch for the signs of caring in my students and tell them how important it is in this profession.

Why choose education?

For me the choice of the education tract was a logical one when thinking of getting my MSN because I am in my 8th year of  teaching nursing.  I should have done this several years ago but with kids and elderly parents that needed care, I didn't feel I had the time to dedicate to this and work full time.  I sort of stumbled onto nursing education by accident.  I never really thought about it as a career choice many years ago but when I relocated back to the valley I saw an add in the paper for a nursing instructor at a proprietary school in Weslaco.  I decided to apply and got the job.  It was really hard at first because I thought I had to know everything and didn't feel comfortable if I didn't .  I am sure I studied twice as hard as the kids the first year to brush up on the gaps in my knowledge base.  I had the feeling of being "thrown in" with little formal orientation.  Thank God for my informal mentors........the other faculty members that tried to answer my questions and reassure me as best they could.  After the initial 6 months I started to feel more at ease and knew I had found the thing in nursing I had always been looking for.  I loved being in the classroom and seeing their eyes light up when they understood something that was difficult.  I took a lot of pride in the pride that the students felt at bettering themselves and becoming something that they knew the whole world respected.  So I guess you could say that my students are my motivation for my following the education track in the MSN program.  I want to be more effective and my learning goal is to find better ways to teach that my students can understand so the next generation of nurses will be knowledgeable and above all caring. 

a moment of panic

I had a moment of panic this morning.  I was catching up on my readings so I could understand the concepts and the readings talked a lot about research and scholarly endeavors as a nurse educator.  For a moment I questioned  "am I really following the right path?"  I don't like math and statistics and have issues with technology and really don't want to have to do research.  I felt a sense of panic.  Then I thought about how I feel when I'm in a classroom teaching a subject I know well and feel passionate about, Mental Health.  The panic subsided and I realized that I don't have to be the greatest researcher and scholar in the world to be able to be a really excellent instructor of nursing,  especially the areas I know well.  So I'm hanging on to that concept for now.